Self Test Revelation

I thought there would be more response to this little exercise of self indulgence. There I go dreaming within the confines of reality again. Anyway, for those of you who took the test and are just too timid to express yourself in a public forum or so controlled by past rejection that the risk of future rejection is inconceivable, take note; that life boat has sailed and it's filled to capacity. No one is more aware of this fact than I am, I'm merely forcing myself to walk on the water. Safe is not walking with God, safe is responding to imagined fear. But mankind on a whole seems content to endure second best as long as we can control it. But God is looking for a different response and it will take us to a better place, a place without fear and self doubt.

On Saturday, October 18, 2008 my eyes were opened to the meaning of my list.

THINGS I LIKE ABOUT MYSELF: God has confirmed these in my spirit even though I consider them to be everyday, common place characteristics. They reveal the core of who I am. Everything else in my life is built around that core.

THINGS I DISLIKE ABOUT MYSELF: This group has to be reversed to grasp it's importance. For example, if I listed shy, the reverse would be brave. These are extraordinary characteristics that I do not possess. As a side note, I highly esteem these in others.

THINGS I HOPE WILL HAPPEN: None of the items I listed in this group can happen until the reversed characteristics in the previous group are developed in me. If I want to overcome the fear of trying new things I must be brave not shy. But I have to remember that God will develop these things in me and it's usually a slow process.

THINGS I HOPE WILL NOT HAPPEN: Simply put, fear. My fears usually walk hand in hand with the things I dislike about myself, areas of inadequacy. If I let God grow me into the person He wants me to be, my fear of the unknown wont seem so ominous. He wants to walk with me into my future and He loves me in spite of my past.